Terror In The Sky
by Kishiro Kitsune
Summary: Sequel to 'Like a Pack of... What'. Bakura and Mariku are plotting hijacking the plane, Joey's paranoid and has a recorder, Nixx, who is Mokuba's boyfriend, is playing airplane jokes, Seto's annoyed, and the others are doing strange things. Shonen ai.
1. Chapter 1

Summary: Sequel to 'Like a Pack of... What?'. The same Yugioh gang goes on a trip via plane to somewhere. Bakura and Mariku are plotting hijacking the plane, Joey's paranoid and has a recorder, Nixx is playing airplane jokes, Seto's annoyed, and the others are doing strange things. Yami x hikari, Seto x Joey, Mokuba x OC (Nixx)

Warning: Characters are Out-Of-Character. This is a humor fic, so please don't read while drinking or eating anything. Oh, and there's shonen ai.

**_Disclaimer_**: Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you see it, I do not own any of the Yugioh characters in this story. Nixxuss Lexus isn't even mine, as I'm borrowing him from a friend (with permission!) to use in this fanfiction.

Chapter 1: Recorder Problems

"Mokuba, they are not coming with us." Seto tells his little brother. Once again they are packing up the van. This time it's not for a road trip but to go to the airport to get on a private plane that will take them to some island in the middle of nowhere.

Mokuba pouts. "But Seto, they're our friends. And we had so much fun on the road trip!"

Nixx tosses his pink suitcase into the back of the van, smirking when it crashes into Seto's head first. Ignoring the way the CEO is now cussing him out, Nixx scoots over to Mokuba and wraps his arms around him. "But Mokie, we should just go by ourselves. The others will just interrupt our alone time."

"Fine, they can come." Seto quickly changes his mind when he hears that. "But I am not getting stuck with Wheeler again!"

Nixx grumbles something about stupid older brothers while Mokuba yells out, "Yay!"

An hour later the van is once again crammed full of people and Seto looks about ready to hang himself for letting himself be tricked by Mokuba again. He's also starting to get very annoyed by Joey and the tape recorder.

Obviously, Seto is once again driving and Joey is sitting right beside him. In the middle row are Yugi, Yami, Duke, and Serenity. In the back row are Malik, Mariku, Ryou, and Bakura. And in the very back with the luggage are Nixx, Mokuba, and Tristan.

Everyone was very surprised when Tristan agreed to go on the trip with them, but when they found out about his stalker most of them sympathized. Seto didn't and Nixx didn't and Bakura and Mariku found it hilarious, but everyone else sympathized.

"Day One of our second trip begins." Joey speaks into the recorder. "Seto is driving and we're all piled back into the van. This time instead of a road trip, we are going on an airplane to some unknown place. Who knows how this will turn out."

"Wheeler, if you don't turn off the recorder I'll do it for you." Seto threatens.

Joey grins. "Seto threatens to turn off the recorder."

"Wheeler, I'm warning you."

"Now it's a warning."

"WHEELER! TURN OFF THE FUCKING RECORDER!"

The van swerves dangerously. Joey slams into the side of the car, as do half the people in the van, and drops the recorder onto the floor. Joey retrieves the recorder, turns it off, and checks for damages before he turns it back on. "So far Seto has lost his temper once and nearly crashed into a semi-truck. Unfortunately, since he didn't hit it we can't do any 'did you get the license of that truck' jokes."

Seto growls when he hears Joey speaking into the recorder. Strange how he gets angry at Joey for recording conversations and not angry at Nixx and Mokuba for their PDA. Speaking of which…

"Lexus, if you don't get your hands off of my brother I swear to God I will--"

"Wait, you mean you're not an atheist?" Duke interrupts.

Seto eyes Duke via the rearview mirror. "What the hell does that have to do with anything?"

Duke shrugs. "Dunno. Are you?"

"Am I what?" Seto asks. He's learned to just answer questions when it comes to this group, or else go insane from sheer amount of questioning. It's not like he has to be truthful about it. He can always make up BS.

"An atheist."

"No, I worship the devil." Seto says with a straight face.

The car goes deathly silent. Joey clicks off the recorder.

"What?" Yugi practically squeaks.

"Finally! Someone else who can understand me!" Bakura exclaims. That comment earns him a smack in the head from Ryou. "What?" He snaps at his hikari. "You're into all that occult stuff!"

"And whose fault do you think that is?" Ryou hisses.

Bakura falls silent. "Oh."

"Kaiba, you don't really worship the devil, do you?" Yami asks, trying to comfort a frightened Yugi. Beside the two Duke is doing the same for Serenity.

Seto snorts and rolls his eyes. "Oh please. I'm an atheist, you fools. Anything can be explained by science and technology, pure and simple." He glares at Yami using the rearview mirror, daring the ex-pharaoh to say anything against him.

"So I suppose there's no magic, either."

Yami never fails to disappoint Seto with his "brilliant" comebacks. But before Seto can make any scathing remark, something- or rather someone- distracts him.

"So we now know that Kaiba does not worship the devil and is an atheist. What do you know? Devlin was right for once!" Joey says into the recorder. "And now he's glaring at me. Se- Kaiba doesn't seem to like recorders very much."

Seto either doesn't notice the near slip-up or chooses to ignore it. "Wheeler, give me the recorder _now_."

Joey childishly clutches the recorder. "Hell no! Get your own recorder!"

"Just give him the stupid recorder!" Mariku grumpily snaps. "Just because you two can flirt and use the excuse of bickering doesn't mean the rest of us want to hear it."

The van falls silent. Everyone seems a little surprised and amused by Mariku's observation. As always, the silence doesn't last for too long.

"The van fell silent after Mariku accused me and Kaiba of flirting during our fights. Of all the outrageous--"

"Wheeler, if you do not turn off that recorder I will pull the van over and dump you on the side of the road!" Seto threatens.

Joey gulps and turns off the recorder. Then he slips it into his pocket. The recorder is off and gone. At least for the time being.

0-0-0

Shiro: Yes, I'm very aware of how short this is. I will try and make the other chapters longer, but I can only stretch out a fic in which the storyline takes place in a matter of hours for so long.

Bast: Did that sentence make any sense to you, hikari?

Shiro: (reads over sentence) Err...? Yes?

Bast: (sighs) Whatever you say.

Shiro: Right... (to readers) Anyway, this story covers the trip to the airport and then the airplane ride to wherever it is they're going. And because of that, there will be yet another sequel to this story after this one. Yay! So that's something to look forward to after this short fic is done.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Disclaimer_**: Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you see it, I do not own any of the Yugioh characters in this story. Nixxuss Lexus isn't even mine, as I'm borrowing him from a friend (with permission!) to use in this fanfiction.

* * *

_Chapter 2: The Airport_

Miraculously, Seto manages to not crash into anything on the way to the airport or as he was parking the car. But now that they're all out of the car and in the airport waiting for their private plane to arrive the trouble can really begin.

Yugi and Yami have disappeared to some unknown corner to make out; Tristan, Duke, and Serenity are in the gift shop; Mariku, Malik, and Bakura are plotting somewhere; Ryou is sitting on a bench keeping a close eye on the three troublemakers while eating a cream puff; Joey is dragging Seto around to look at everything; and Nixx and Mokuba have disappeared to who-knows-where.

From his spot on the bench, Ryou can perfectly see Mariku, Malik, and Bakura standing together pointing at different random things and plotting in general. And then the unexpected happens; the three begin fighting over something. The argument comes in an end when Bakura stomps over to Ryou and sits down.

"What's wrong, Bakura?" Ryou asks, wondering what it was that made the trio fight. Very rarely do they fight over something serious and by the way Bakura is acting it seems serious.

Bakura grumbles something under his breath that Ryou can't quite hear. Ryou asks him to repeat himself so he does so. "Mariku's planning on yelling out that he has a bomb. I told him it was a bad idea, but he wouldn't listen."

The expression on Ryou's face goes from curious to angry in a nanosecond. "Mariku!" He yells across the airport. "Don't you dare shout out that you've got a bomb!"

Obviously, that wasn't the most brilliant thing to shout out when you're in an airport. Even if you are with a billionaire CEO and his little brother. Within seconds security guards have surrounded Ryou and Bakura, the former snickering in amusement over the whole thing, and two guards are marching over to Mariku and Malik, who are holding onto the wall to prevent them from falling over as they laugh hysterically.

The commotion attracts the attention of Seto and Joey, who were over at the airport's Subways because Joey got hungry, and it takes 5 minutes of Seto talking to the guards to get them to back off. It takes a lot of bribe money to make the guards drop the subject completely and ignore anything else that the trio does to cause trouble.

Bakura looks put-off by this and tries to go off to talk to Mariku and Malik but Ryou grabs his collar and keeps him from going.

With the danger of being arrested because of Bakura, Mariku, and Malik's stupidity over, Joey drags Seto off to go get his sandwich, which was forgotten in the chaos of the 'bomb scare'.

Over in another part of the airport, strange noises coming from the bathroom that Yami and Yugi disappeared into ten minutes ago are keeping people away from said bathroom. No one is willing to investigate and find out what the noises really are, although they have a pretty good idea of what it could be.

After several strange incidents involving sparklers, shaving cream, and a toilet in the girls bathroom exploding, which Nixx claimed he had _nothing _to do with, Seto decides it would be best to get the rambunctious group onto the plane and get out of the airport before something horrible happens.

It ends up being entirely impossible, but that's completely logical. While Yami, Yugi, Tristan, Duke, Serenity, and even Nixx and Mokuba board the plane in a somewhat orderly fashion, and Ryou ends up dragging Bakura onto the plane, Malik and Mariku refuse to budge from the airport because of the pigeons.

Yes. Pigeons.

It is no longer the highly intelligent squirrels that are causing the problem but exceptionally well trained pigeons causing trouble. Because Mariku and Malik had absolutely nothing to do with them randomly attacking people. No, not at all.

It ends up being Joey who convinces the two to get on the plane. He tells them that there will be plenty of people to torture when they get to the vacation spot and there will be seagulls there instead of pigeons. The two blonds decide that seagulls are much more evil than pigeons and happily board the plane, talking about all the wonderful trouble they can cause at the beach. Seto catches the phrase "rice and Alka-Seltzer" used at least twice in one sentence and decides he does not want to know. Ever.

Joey, on the other hand, has discovered a box of raisins in his pocket and is happily munching on them. Ah, the joys of sun-dried California raisins.

This is all the calm before the storm.

* * *

Shiro: This chapter shouldn't be called "The Airport", it should be called "The Writer's Block Chapter". I'm hoping the next (and final) chapter will turn out much better. And longer too. So expect a while before the next chapter, seeing as how I'm hoping to make it longer and I've got a History/English project I should _really _start typing up. If you couldn't tell, I'm a horrible procrastinator.

Kitsune: She's so bad that even my reminders do nothing.

Shiro: It's really sad, if you think about it.

Kitsune: Look stuff up at the library tomorrow and you can get it done this weekend.

Shiro: T.T There's a fun-killer right there.

Bast: At least you chose a good topic! What could be more fun to write about than pirates? That is a US history topic.

Shiro: ...


	3. Chapter 3

Shiro: (gasps) What's this? It's actually a long chapter! Yay! What a wonderful way to end a fanfiction!

**_Disclaimer_**: Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you see it, I do not own any of the Yugioh characters in this story. Nixxuss Lexus isn't even mine, as I'm borrowing him from a friend (with permission!) to use in this fanfiction.

_Chapter 3: Airplane Hijinks_

"Psychopathic nutcases." Seto hisses under his breath. "Mental ward imbeciles. They need to be locked up somewhere far, far away from me and then have the key melted down then shattered into a million pieces and then have each piece shoved in a deep hole and buried."

"They'd just pick the lock." Joey reminds him.

Seto just grumbles something and looks out the plane window to stare at the runway and all the seagulls and pigeons out on it.

The entire group has been on the plane for fifteen minutes already and they've gotten nowhere because of the birds that refuse to move no matter what the airport workers get after them with. They even resorted to trying to get Mariku, Malik, and Bakura's help with them, but Mariku and Malik don't get along with the pigeons very well so they were forced to drop that plan. Bakura is very disappointed that he can't wreak mass chaos and capture one of the birds to torment the two blond Egyptian's with, but Ryou distracts him.

Eventually the airport workers get the birds chased away and the plane is able to speed off down the runway and take flight. That's when the trouble really starts.

Joey, it seems, is terrified of heights and believes the plane will end up crashing because of Bakura and Mariku. On any other occasion that might actually happen, but Seto has prepared the pilot and gotten the door to the cockpit locked tight so the two have no chance of getting in there. Thank gods.

Meanwhile, Yugi has discovered that Yami has an intense fear of heights and is distracting him with airplane peanuts. Thankfully, the distraction is working so far. Toward the back of the plane are Nixx and Mokuba, who are quietly talking and being all flirty with one another like usual. Duke and Serenity are a few seats in front of them being all cute together. Duke's also trying to convince Serenity to join the 'mile-high club' with him. So far his attempts have been unsuccessful, which is probably for the best since both Joey and Tristan would strangle him and then throw him out of the plane.

Speaking of throwing people out of the airplane, that would be Bakura and Mariku's current plot. Only it's more along the lines of, "Wouldn't it be funny if we shoved Tristan off the plane?"

"Oh yes. Hilarious." Seto deadpans. "And then we'd have to explain to everyone exactly why the two of you shoved someone off a plane. Wheeler," He glares at Joey, who is clinging to his arm in fear. "Let go."

Joey shakes his head. "They'll kill me! They'll kill us all!"

"Does everyone on this plane have a phobia with dying because of those three?" Yugi asks. "I mean, Tristan refuses to go anywhere near those two because they want to shove him off the plane, the pilot has bolted and probably _welded _the door to the cockpit shut, Joey's practically delirious, and then there's Yami." He pokes his beloved Yami. "You're suppose to be the almighty pharaoh and here you're scared of an airplane! An _airplane_, Yami!"

Yami almost whimpers and sinks lower in the seats. "I hate heights. It has nothing to do with those two."

Yugi rolls his eyes and then falls silent.

"What the hell!" Malik falls on his ass with an audible thump and stares in surprise toward the front of the plane.

Everyone immediately looks where Malik is looking, wondering what could have possibly surprised the blond that much. Living with Mariku and Isis, there isn't much that can surprise Malik anymore. Then again, seeing Shadi materialize out of nowhere can be a pretty shocking sight.

"Shadi?! What are you doing here?" Yugi asks, jumping out of his seat.

"I thought I killed you." Bakura growls. "I guess I should have made sure." He cracks his knuckles and stands up, his eyes murderous.

Ryou rolls his eyes. "Down boy." He hisses, jerking his yami back into the seat. "No killing people on vacation. Wait until we get home."

"You mean you'll actually let me kill him?" Bakura asks in surprise.

"If you're good."

Yugi, Yami, and the Ishtar duo ignore Ryou and Bakura while the two continue with their conversation on whether or not Bakura will be allowed to kill Shadi.

"What are you doing here, creepy guy?" Mariku asks, protectively wrapping his arms around Malik's waist.

"It is the result of some unfortunate events that I am here today, young friends. For you see-"

"Yeah, go ahead and kill him." Ryou tells Bakura. "We're on vacation. We don't have time for any 'unfortunate events'."

"I agree with Ryou." Yugi speaks up, which surprises and shocks everyone present.

Shadi is wise enough to look frightened when Bakura and Mariku both smirk and begin walking toward him while they crack their knuckles. He gets even more frightened when no one-- not even Ryou, Yugi, and Yami, the supposed good-guys-- tries to stop the two yami's. If anything, Nixx looks like he wants to join the two but he knows Mokuba would never let him.

"Nothing too bloody." Seto says. "Blood's too hard to clean up."

"Don't wanna know how you know that." Joey mumbles as he looks through his big-bag-of-food for another box of raisins. He grins when he finds an unopened box and proceeds to open it and devour the raisins.

"Always knew you were into some kinky shit, Kaiba." Mariku remarks, shooting a grin at the CEO.

"Says the psychopath with a collection of daggers." Malik says. (Seto muttering that he's most definitely _not _into anything kinky like that can be heard in the background, along with Joey's assurance that he believes him.)

"They're yours too." Mariku reminds his hikari as he unhooks the Millennium Rod from his belt loop. "So, how are we going to do this, Bakura?"

"Shove him off the plane! Shove him off!" Nixx yells from in the back.

Bakura and Mariku exchange grins and then advance forward. Within seconds the two have effectively captured Shadi and opened the door to the plane. Exactly how they were able to open the door from that high up in the air without anything bad happening is beyond anyone's knowledge.

"Any last words?" Bakura cackles.

"I do wish-- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Shadi doesn't have time to finish his sentence as Mariku nonchalantly shoves him out the door. The two yami's watch him fall until he's out of sight and until Duke complains about a breeze. The two shut the door and then go take a seat beside their respective hikari's.

"That worked out well." Yugi says.

"You could have grabbed his turban, you know." Duke speaks up.

Everyone except Seto looks at Duke like he's insane.

"Why would we have grabbed the stupid turban? What would be the point in that?" Bakura asks.

Duke shrugs. "Dunno. I've just always wondered if Shadi keeps anything under his turban."

"And we could have unwound it and used it to tie you two nutcases up." Nixx speaks up.

Bakura snarls and makes a threatening gesture. "Look here you little brat, if anyone on this Ra-forsaken contraption is insane it would be you!"

"Would not!"

"Would too!"

"Would not!"

"Would too!"

"Would not!"

"Would too!"

"Would not!"

"Would too!"

"Would n--"

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Seto roars.

Duke snaps his fingers. "Damn, and he was doing such a good job of not yelling. So much for that."

"Duke, that's not very nice." Serenity comments.

"Girl-Wheeler, if you hadn't noticed, _none _of us are very nice." Nixx says. "Not even mister goody-two-shoes," He points at Yugi. "-over there is very nice. So get used to it."

"_Someone _has PSM." Mariku mutters.

"Don't you mean PMS?" Tristan asks from a "safe" distance of five feet.

Mariku turns around to glare at Tristan, who shrinks back in his seat and wishes there was a five foot thick steel wall between him and the blonde psycho. He then rethinks that wish and decides he'd rather have a pigeon or a squirrel as protection. That would work much better.

Silence falls over the thirteen passengers and manages to last a whole ten minutes. And then Joey has to go and ruin the quiet.

"Are we there yet?"

"Oh my god, did you have to fucking ask that?" Bakura groans. "Now you've gone and gotten him started!" He pokes Mariku in the side.

"Ouch!" Mariku smacks Bakura's hand away. "That hurts, you jerk! So, are we there yet?"

"No." Seto says in a monotonous voice.

Mariku looks satisfied with that answer for all of five seconds. "When will we get there?"

"No soon enough." Seto grumbles.

"He means 2 hours." Mokuba translates.

Mariku nods. "Okay." He leans over Malik, despite Malik's yells of complaint, to stare out the window for a minute or so. Then he wads up a piece of paper and throws it at Bakura's head. "Are we there yet?"

"No." Bakura growls.

"Okay." Mariku looks around at everyone. "Hey, Yami. Are we there yet?"

Yami edges away from Mariku. "Why is he looking at me? Is he plotting to kill me? YUGI, SAVE ME!!!!!!!" He clings to Yugi's arm and shuts his eyes. "I don't wanna die, I don't wanna die, I don't wanna die, I don'--"

Yugi smacks Yami on the head. "Stop it! He's not plotting to kill you!"

"Really?" Yami asks, opening his eyes to look up at his Light.

Yugi glances over at Mariku, who is busy doodling a picture of him and Bakura as stick figures killing Yami, who is also a stick figure. "Sorry, I lied. He's plotting to kill you."

"Never thought you could be such a bastard, Yugi." Duke remarks. "This trip is bringing out a whole different side of you."

"Shut up, Duke."

0-0-0

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"How about now?"

"No."

"Are we there now?"

"DAMN IT, WE ARE NOT THERE YET!" Seto screams, ready to strangle Mariku for continuously asking if they're there yet. He's been at it for ten minutes, which is ten minutes too long for Seto. "Will someone shut him up already?!"

Malik stands up and grabs Mariku's hand. "Come on, I'm going to introduce you to the Mile-High club."

"Oooo!" Mariku appears interested in what Malik is saying and stands up. "What's that?"

"Come with me and find out."

Everyone ignores the two as they walk through the aisle to the bathroom, where they shut the door. They all sighed with relief, thankful for the peace and quiet. And then a scream is heard.

"Seto, are you _sure _it was the _cockpit _that you had locked up tight?" Ryou asks.

Seto pales. "Oh shit."

There's a mad rush as Seto, Duke, Tristan, Bakura, and Ryou run for the cockpit to protect the pilot from Mariku and Malik. Seto jerks open the door and everyone looks in to see Mariku and Malik making out on the floor of a rather large bathroom.

"What the hell?!" Malik screeches. "Do you mind?!"

"We heard a scream!" Tristan defensively yells.

"Yeah, because there was a cockroach! Now leave before I let Mariku devour your soul or something!" Malik yells, trying to kick at whomever's legs are closest.

Seto shuts the door and the traumatized group goes back and takes their seats again. Joey holds out a box of raisins in front of Seto. "Raisin?" He offers.

Seto sighs and looks down at the raisins. Then he gives in and takes a couple. "Thanks…"

0-0-0

"That was the longest hour and a half of my life." Yugi grumbles as they all exit the plane. "If I ever start hearing odd noises coming from the bathroom after Mariku and Malik are done in there and if I even think about commenting on it, just do me a favor and shoot me."

"Really?" Bakura asks, wondering where he can get a gun. Then he realizes that he'd be doing Yugi a favor and decides to forget the idea.

Yugi glares at him. "No." He snaps.

Yami wraps an arm around Yugi. "Come on, aibou. I think you should go get some sleep."

"I don't need sleep." Yugi says.

"Yes you do." Yami responds as he leads Yugi to the hotel. "And I'll stay with you. I could use some sleep too."

The group slowly splits up to take a needed break from one another. Duke and Tristan are actually getting along well enough to walk around with Serenity. Together. Creepy, isn't it? And Nixx and Mokuba are off walking around holding hands while Bakura, Ryou, Mariku, and Malik are off torturing tourists. Well, Bakura and Mariku are. Ryou and Malik are there to make sure things don't get too out of hand. As for Seto and Joey…

"That didn't turn out as bad as I thought it would." Joey remarks. "What do you think, Kaiba?"

Seto smirks. "Not bad at all, puppy." He starts walking toward the hotel, leaving Joey to catch up.

"Hey, Kaiba! You bastard, wait for me!" But it's with no anger in his voice that Joey yells that and then runs toward Seto to catch up.

**THE END**

0-0-0-0-0-0

Shiro: Ta-da! 'Tis the end! As for what will happen during their little vacation, you'll have to wait and see in the next fanfiction: "Rocking on the Waters". Unfortunently, it may be a while before that one gets posted since I need to take a little break to get my creativity level back up. That and it's getting close to the end of school, which means final projects need to be finished or at least worked on a little, and I've got a new video game to play. (Final Fantasy X-- finally got it!) And then there's this whole Anime Mid-Atlantic problem... don't ask. I'm not even sure what's going on. I'm either going with my friends or not going at all.

Bast: Gee, that explains everything.

Shiro: Shuddup, yami! Anywho, there's also this Kingdom Hearts fanfiction I've been working on... it's coming along slowly. Too slowly. (sighs) Oh well... back to work.

COMING SOON:

**Rocking on the Waters** (By the way, all of the following quotes have been made up on the spot, but I will make sure to put them in the fic.)

"Somehow I get the feeling that going on a boat was a horrible idea."

"Oh, really? What made you think that? I mean, other than the fact that we're _stranded _on a fucking _deserted island_!!!"

"..."

"I hate you."

"Aww, he loves you, Joey! Isn't that sweet?"

0-0

"Mariku, that's a coconut."

"So?"

"We are not cooking the fucking coconut!!!"

"Why not?"

"You know... I have no idea. Light that sucker on fire!"

0-0

"Yami, what are you doing."

"I'm trying to rewire the radio so that it'll actually work and we may be able to get some help."

(sigh) "That's not going to work."

"It worked on Guilligan's Island!!"

"That was TV, Yami."

"Oh... So it really won't work?"

"Nope."

"Damn."


End file.
